work dilemma
Ok, I don’t want to make a habit about talking about work, but I need to.
I have a bit of a dilemma. I left my old team, and while I like my co-workers, who are also my friends, I couldn’t stand my manager. My new management is much better to work for, but the work itself is becoming problematic: no requirements, no direction, I can’t actually work on anyuthing because nothing’s been decided. It’s driving me absolutely batty. To make matters worse, after being out sick for a day and a half, I can’t work on anything for fear of messing up someone else’s work. It’s extremely frustrating, and I don’t know how long I can function in this environment. And I keep getting called about this project and that project from my old team, which makes getting anything done even more difficult.
But that’s not really the worst of it. The worst thing is, in my mind, that if I go to my current management and say I can’t handle this, I need to do something different, I know where I’ll end up - back under the manager I can’t stand. Frankly, I think I’d rather just walk out the door with no job than face that again. It would mean taking something out of town until I could find something local, so I’d have a long commute for a while, but that’d be preferable to working under him again.
So there it is: I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place at work at the moment. I’ve been off the mat a lot lately because of my illness and working late, and being on the mat helps me keep some perspective in just about everything, and I feel a bit off-center lately. I know once I’m back on things will become clearer as I become more centered. I just hate hanging out at work this way.